Sayings of the Wise Pt 1

English majors and teachers (both of which I am) love playing with words, and from time to time I come up with pithy little sayings - if I do say so myself. Here are two such beasts.

1) When you need to explain that you would really like to try something but are afraid of failure, spin it this way: "I would if I could but I can't so I won't." Incidentally, I've taught modal verbs of probability and possibility using this phrase.

2) You know we are living in a Starbucks world when you hear the following play on words: "That's a tall order on such short notice."

Enjoy and use until your heart's content - or until your friends and family are thoroughly tired of them. If you keep using them beyond that point, it just becomes offensive.

When Broadband Goes Broadbad

Quick bulletin - we have discovered that there is absolutely no chance of us having broadband while here in the UK due to a lack of a USB port on our CPU. WAS! (What a shame) Thus all posting and emailing will continue to take place from the school where I work. Which also means that since it's mid-term break next week, little posting or emailing will take place, barring a couple of quick email checks at the local library. JFYI.

A Day in the Life of Kenny

I feel like all I ever do on this blog is apologize...again, I find myself posting a week later than I had planned. Pretend it's still last week, and you'll get the full gist.

Quelle semaine! What a week! I began it knowing that it would be the busiest of my entire programme – and Wednesday in particular – but it has been that and then some. I’ve been teaching some fairly demanding Year 7s, 8s and 9s but they’re all pretty much under my thumb now. Then there’s the Year 11s, with whom I have an excellent rapport on account of their all being around 16 years old, but they are in shutdown mode because of their school leaving exams coming up, called GCSEs. This is the end of compulsory education for them – yes, at 16. I’m not in favour of it, but that’s a matter for another blog entry.

In other news, Cheri has polished up her contribution, entitled A Day in the Life of Kenny, so without further ado…

6:30-7:00 Kenny wakes up. His quiet “Mommy” turns into a demanding “Mommy-AH!!” (get me out of bed now!).

7:00-7:15 Breakfast. His own cereal (pronounced ‘cirral’) followed by spoonfuls of Mommy & Daddy’s cereal.

7:15-8:00 Free Playtime. Usually follows Mark around while he gets ready for work. Always wants to play on the bed, calls this “boing boing”.

8:00-9:00 Mommy playtime and get dressed. We usually read at least a dozen books, his favourite being “Jesus” and “Toot Toot” which is Thomas the Tank the Tank Engine of course.

9:00-9:30 Roomtime. He likes to listen to the Tarzan soundtrack while he plays. His favourite song is the shoo-be-doo song, which he tries to sing and just butchers. Usually does exactly the same thing everyday. Lines up the Teddy Bears, organises all the people on the pirate ship, makes a tower out of his poles, lines up all the toys that are left over, stacks all his blocks, knocks 'em all down and yells and the top of his lungs “oh no!!”.

9:30-10:00 Tidy up and get ready to go for a walk. He will walk around getting ready saying “a what” meaning a walk of course. Kenny puts his toys away and it takes 30 mins. when you do it one toy at a time!

10:00-11:00 Out for a walk. Sometimes just to the shops, other times to the park to kick a ball around, he calls this “ball kick”. “Ball” is low inflection, “kick” is high, as he says it.

11:30-12:00 Lunch. He asks for his “Mote” which is milk and his “Toby” which is his Thomas yogurt.

12:00-2:30 Nap. Usually talks to himself and uses all his words at least once and says “night night bear, night night duck” (because he has bears and ducks on his curtain) before falling asleep.

2:30 Kenny’s up. Always acknowledges bears and ducks on his curtain and then takes him about 15-30 mins. to adjust to being awake again.

3:00-5:30 Snack and Play. Kenny likes to eat Popsicles and cookies for his snack. He loves to play outside on the patio, which usually involves water, or he likes to “colour”, which is usually re-arranging his crayons. This keeps him busy until the Royal Homecoming of Daddy and he always has to announce what he is playing with at the moment Mark comes in the door, then it’s all smiles and excitement.

5:30-6:00 Dinner. Kenny is getting very good at feeding himself and will eat almost anything.

7:00-7:30 Bath Time. Enjoy a nice soak with his bath time buddies: turtle, whale, duck, book and cup.

7:30 Bed. He’s pretty good at going to sleep right away but usually spends up to 30 mins. saying good-night to the bear and duck, and trying all his words at least once more.

Looking ahead: Kenny looks forward to going home to Canada and seeing all his Crossway buddies (you know who you are!) and taking long walks on the beach.

Cute Kennyisms

-Currently has a foot obsession, always talking about ‘beet’ and ‘toesies’
-Likes to play peek-a-boo but says “see you” instead
-One of his favourite activities is to look through his box of photos
-Counting 1-2-3 in Kennyspeak: By Two Pee (and sometimes Pour)
-Likes to call himself a good boy (“Bo Boy”) and when he’s not good yells “obey” (“Bobay!”).
-Has taken up the air guitar while listening to music (“mesa”)
-Loves to dance and has invented a move called “the floor polish” where he squats and does the sailor arm move close to the floor
-When we ask Kenny if he’s going to be a big brother he smiles and says "no" in the sweetest voice
-His favourite animal sound is the lion and he even does paw actions!
-Loves to colour but it’s more like re-arranging crayons

Bussing it in Bristol

I had another opportunity to preach the gospel to myself today. Having missed last Thursday and Tuesday (yesterday) because of a cough I can't shake, I felt really upbeat this morning, getting up at 6am (!!!!! for anyone who knows I like my morning sleep), shaving my beard off (are you happy, Mom?), and generally making a new start. My Muesli tasted sweet and Kenny was a darling. I was out the door just after 7am with a Tim Horton's travelmug full of Taylor's of Harrogate coffee, Lazy Sunday blend - thanks to Cheri. So far so good.

Then I waited for the #41 for an hour. I lost count of the number of #43s that went by, with each driver telling me the #41 was 6-10 minutes behind him. At 8am it finally came, and the fare was higher than I remember - £2.50, when I only had £2.38. I told the driver, and he said "well, that's what it is." And oh, the anger in my heart. Not towards the bus driver, but towards the situation, and by extension towards God himself. I had to remind myself that "on Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand..." To cut a long story short, I arrived at school with a few minutes to spare and everything has gone just fine. God is gracious.

I've heard good reviews of a book called "Uprooting Anger" by Robert D. Jones. Anybody read it?

In other news, I can definitely confirm that as far as our family and Air Canada are concerned, we are returning to Canada on July 31st, 2006. So the rumours are true. We're very excited to rejoin friends and family in beautiful southwestern British Columbia. See you soon!

Here We Go Again...

I'd like to take this opportunity to broadcast more widely the news that the BT installer is coming tomorrow. BT reserves the right to find something wrong during the installation, as always, but here's hoping that we are fully communicado in just over twenty-four hours.

In other news, the Bear herself is in the process of composing a blog entitled 'A Day in the Life of Kenny.' Currently healthy, if not yet wealthy and wise, Kenny is enjoying 11-12 hour sleeps, 2-3 hour naps, and scads of happy playtime in between. I won't give any more away for fear of being accused of being a spoiler. Watch this space. If BT comes through as promised and hoped, the post may appear sooner rather than later.

No less than four (FOUR!) rolls of film are on their way to the TruPrint lab on the other side of Britain, where they do a very good job of developing and provide you with free replacement film and all the images on CD for a reasonable price. So all you relatives and friends, watch your email inboxes for a truckload of new photos. I'll then try to spruce up this site with some Kenny pics.

Busy time at Sir Bernard Lovell Secondary School. I'm currently teaching a revision unit for Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck to unmotivated 16 year-olds writing their GCSEs (General Certificate of Secondary Education exams) and a Medieval Romance Epic/Detective Fiction unit to Year 9s (trust me, the genres do work together). Next week I begin a poetry unit with Year 7s and a fun unit on the Truman Show to Year 9s, who have just written the SATs (Standard Assessement Tests) and whose brains are obviously on the fritz.

Have recently read or re-read:

Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp
Worship in Spirit and in Truth by John Frame
Under the Tuscan Sun by Frances Mayes
The Cross-Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney (original print run)

Am currently reading or re-reading:

The Radical Cross by A.W. Tozer
Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper
Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
The Sovereignty of God by Arthur W. Pink (an ongoing project. It's one of those books where you read a line and have to gaze into space for a bit to soak in the full effect of what he is saying)

Anybody like to share with me what you are reading at the moment?